(Apologies to the theme for "Gilligan's Island")

Here's a tale of some pantywaists
Controlled Chaos was their name
Set sail for the Uplands ice
For a one hour game
A one hour game

These girls started getting rough
Their tiny brains did smoke
If not for the trapper of their goalie boy
The score would've been a joke
The score would've been a joke

5 goals were scored by the Piccolo boys
An organized mayhem tromp
Big Joe had 2 the Mullet 1
Darrel & Hedges adding stomp
To this Piccolo romp

These Kaos kids were fit to be tied
Every Gelatohead a hero
Chaos tried and then they died
Ending up with a Zero
Yes a big fat Zero

AND THEN !

No thought, no mind, no motor skills
No brain waves to be
Crashing down on Duckman's head
Was an Easton Synergy
An Easton Synergy

So now …

There's Jillyboy, the Chipper too
The hack artist and his knife
The loony tunes
The Cro-Magnon man and the swollen gland
Mayhem on Lose-again's pile